Sodor Rail – the Fat Controller’s new privatised railway company serving the Island of Sodor – must have the worst safety and timekeeping record for any railway.  I shall prove this now by going through the Thomas the Tank Engine Collection – a book I received for Christmas a few years back.

Thomas and Gordon: Thomas, on coach shunting duties, comes into the station later than intended, meaning that Gordon’s express leaves only just on time. Thomas is not uncoupled from the train. OK, so it’s not an accident or anything, but a potential late running express train. However, Thomas did end up at a station that wasn’t his own, required posession of a siding and also a path to return to his own station and yard.

Thomas’s Train: Due to an engine (Henry) failure, Thomas is entrusted with pulling the passenger train that Henry cannot.  He leaves the station without being coupled to his train, and has to return to get them. This would have left the train to leave the station late, due to an engine failure, and as Thomas wasn’t correctly coupled to the train it would have left much later than scheduled. Again, a path would have been required for this late running train as well as Thomas having to return to the station. I will disregard the incorrect punctuation in the title for now.

Thomas and the Trucks: Thomas and Edward swap duties, so Thomas is heading a goods train.  He fails to stop at the correct station and just about stops in time to avoid the buffers at the end of the line. To quote the book, ‘luckily the line was clear as they swerved into the goods yard’. Of course, there is also the unplanned swapping of engines between duties, which resulted in an engine not cleared for goods use to be used. There is also the issue that Thomas, who is ‘tired of pushing coaches [and] wants to see the world’ doesn’t have the correct route knowledge for this line.

Thomas and the Breakdown Train: A new engine, James, has an accident caused by his brakes catching fireand Thomas helps retrieve him. A derailment is never good news really.  The front trucks are all damaged in the crash and so is James’ tender.  Goods in those carraiges is also damaged then, as well as the rails and the lineside fencing.  James however is fine but is sent for repairs.

Thomas and the Guard: Henry’s train is late to Thomas’ branch line junction. He leaves quickly to get back to timetable, leaving his guard behind in the process, but is stopped at a signal. Now, the presence of a signal on a single-track branch line served by one train is a bit of a mystery in itself.  I must congratulate Sodor Rail in letting the branch line train wait for the late running main line train, caused by an engine problem; ‘my system is out of order’ (Henry – that’s two failures for Henry so far). I believe that Thomas did make up for the lost time on the route so that’s a plus.

Thomas goes Fishing: A water tower at a station is out of order, so Thomas is filled up with water from a nearby river with a bucket dropped from a bridge. Shortly after, Thomas experieces boiler problems and is sent to a siding where he is inspected to find that there is fish in him. First, an out of order water tower at a station is a problem, but not an uncommon one even on the mainland.  Thomas then stops on a bridge – what do the passengers think of this? – and is filled up with water from the river. This would have taken quite some time. At the next station, Thomas is uncoupled and sent to a siding, meaning that another engine would have to continue with Thomas’ train.  Fish is found in the boiler.  Why didn’t the driver and fireman notice the fish when they were pouring the water from the bucket into the engine? And why was Thomas blamed for it at the end – it wasn’t his fault…

Thomas, Terence and the Snow: Thomas, out in snow without his snowplough, gets caught in a drift and has to be pulled out with a tractor wile a bus comes for the passengers.  The wrong kind of snow? Maybe. Of course, we know from the beginning of this year what effect snow has on trains in this country, so we can’t really blame Sodor Rail for this one, and they did try and continue to operate a service despite the conditions.  I think that, despite the delays and cancellations to service, this one is a plus for Sodor Rail.

Thomas and Bertie: Thomas and a bus race between two stations. Thomas wins the race.  Such a common problem with the public transport infrastructure in this country. A bus and a train have been given the same route between two stations. I do think it’s a plus for Sodor Rail as they managed to get there first, and after this incidence, Bertie travels around the towns taking passengers to the station where Thomas then takes them onwards.

The Fat Controller’s Engines: All the engines on the Island of Sodor are going to the mainland.  While showing the shadowing replacement engines what they’re doing, Thomas has an accident and has to be repaired. Again, an accident which has left an engine damaged.  On the plus side, the workmen do manage to fix Thomas so he does manage to travel. Cause of accident, brakes I think.

Thomas comes to Breakfast: Thomas rolls out of his shed and, unable to stop, comes off the end of the (unbuffered) rails and into the stationmaster’s house (or the Fat Controller’s house on the TV series).  A cleaner has messed with the controls inside of Thomas, which is what causes him to roll out of the shed without a driver.  Temporary rails have to be laid on the road at the end of the siding in order to pull Thomas back, so the road would have to have been closed.  There is also sustainable damage to the stationmaster’s house and his garden (which included trees) while the stationmaster’s wife has to recook their breakfast.  ‘You miserable engine’…  A replacement engine – a diesel railcar of all things – has to be put onto Thomas’ branch line while Thomas is repaired. Again, Thomas gets the blame for this, rather than the cleaner who messed with Thomas’ controls…

I’ve just realised how long a process this is going to be.  This book is separated by character in the series and not in the order the stories were released in, so I shall continue next time with Percy, the Small Engine.

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